Future Planning, Looking Back…

Today marks 10 months since Ken died. He was still active, but losing the ability to communicate clearly and had increasing pain. We both had the feeling his time would be less than we had hoped for, but were preparing for the next year and whatever it would bring for his needs and the changes we were facing.

Each year on January 1st we would write out our plans, hopes and anticipated events for the coming year. Last year we had already been considering the next year with Kens sudden Brain Cancer diagnosis and did not make any notes or plans, other than my own journal entries asking God how best to care of and manage things with Ken no longer able to do what he had been accustomed to. Big changes were on the horizon, but for me I had no idea how intense these changes would be.

Two years ago today we were living in Texas for 8 months having been transferred from California for a job. We were away from all family just a few hours from our oldest daughter and a few states from two others and their families. We were waiting on the Lord for our next move and plans for our future.We wrote out a few obvious plans in front of us, like work and our upcoming lease renewal along with the hope of continuing our move to NorthWest Arkansas. We made plans to visit the kids wherever they were and continue working and saving towards our next move. We developed our 30 year plan with Ken working for the next 20 and continuing building our retirement along with plans to build a home in Arkansas in the next few years. We also had plans to get involved with a church family and for Ken to return to teaching and mentoring others. We had a great plan and yet God had an even greater one.

So here I am two years later from the plans Ken and I made, and one year from the sudden change in our plans ahead. This year my ‘plans’ or lack-thereof are drastically different. I don’t have the initiative, desire or capacity to plan out this year or dream beyond just getting through and trusting God for whatever lies ahead. For now my focus and considerations include; Family and Friends, Kippy (my new puppy), part time job at Beautiful Lives Thrift Boutique (BTW non profit organization helping women locally and globally), bible study and worship. I know God’s plans have been and continue to be the best for me to follow, especially in this season of my ‘New Chapter’.

I am still in that theater lobby waiting for the doors to open where I can enter in and begin the next chapter. Or perhaps this lobby is already the start of that next chapter or Act III…

I pray that as you read this today that you are encouraged and reminded of the gift of each new day and year is. That as you make your plans for this coming year, even with all of the uncertainty of the Pandemic and other issues we face that you will not lose sight of the value of this time now and what God may have for you to consider and step into.

The scripture that continues to remind me to continue moving forward, making some plans, but to ultimately hold any and all of my plans loosely and trust in God through it ALL :

“Many are the plans in a man’s (woman’s) heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.”
Proverbs 19:21