The Widows Window

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Sherry sat where she would each night, close to the window where the cool night air would carry with it an opportunity to breathe in and out clean and fresh air. But tonight, she sat with the drapes closed tightly, no breeze, no light, nothing from the window to refresh her. She could not, would not open her drapes on this night as she only desired to sit alone in the dark without any reminders of what used to be. No longer was she sharing this refreshing experience with her Tim, the chair next to her had been empty for a while now. The memories of their time sharing the seasonal views, fresh air and breeze from the window were too much to bear for Sherry.  And so, she sat in the dark, with her memories, catching her tears in a pillow.

But this night would be different as she suddenly laughed out loud, recalling the silly times that Tim would send the pillow sailing across the room, just to startle Sherry, which would leave them both laughing. While she sat there in the dark, this jolt caused her pillow to drop from her lap onto the side table, knocking over her glasses. She turned on the light to retrieve her glasses and saw illuminated before her the very words her precious Tim had shared with her just days before he died. “The unfolding of your words gives light; it gives understanding to the simple.” Psalm 119:130. At once, she felt a sense of peace and calm as she picked up her bible and held it close to her heart.

In what seemed like just a moment, Sherry stood up, asked God for strength, comfort, and peace. Turning to the window, she pulled back the drapes, opened the window, and as the breeze blew across her face, her tears cooled and rolled off her chin. These tears were reminding her of how much she had to live for, even without her Tim. She knew that, however hard it would be that she would decide to look to her window each day as she opened her bible. She would no longer keep the drapes closed all the time, but enjoy what wonders awaited on the other side. The birds, trees, flowers, clouds, sunshine, animals and so much more that God had created for her to enjoy.

In no time, she was looking forward to her moments at the window where she noticed smudges, some mud on the sill, and a few bug remnants. She carefully cleaned her window and was astonished at how much clearer everything looked outside. The light was filtering through the window on this day and casting a unique beam onto Tim’s chair. Sherry believed this was God’s way of letting her know that she was not alone and that while it was okay to sit in darkness for a time, that opening up that window was the beginning of a new adventure for her.

Of course, there would be days when Sherry would need some time and space to sit alone, quiet with the drapes drawn to cry out to God, read His word, or just be still. But she was made all the more ready to open her window again after these quiet moments. And there were times that a loving friend would encourage her to open her window if just for a moment, or at times sit next to her on those days when she needed the comfort and presence of a friend.

Now, as Sherry opened her drapes and window, she began to realize areas in her life she had been holding back from, much like the drapes blocked out the light from her window.  Life without Tim would be so very different, but she was discovering more and more each day to look for opportunities to open the window of her life as it were. Where she could explore, discover, enjoy, and experience her new life as a widow loved by God and not alone.

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I had no idea where this title and story were heading as I sat down to write. I prayed, and it seemed as though this was and is just the way it was intended. Of course the names and story itself are not real, but anyone who has become widowed may see a bit of themselves in this story. If so, please feel free to share your thoughts with me or others. It’s by sharing our real experiences as widows that others gain a better understanding and appreciation of this chapter in our lives. May we bravely open the drapes and windows of our lives and trust God to provide light and understanding through his word.

May God bless and encourage you my friend,

Pati

“The unfolding of your words gives light; it gives understanding to the simple.”
Psalm 119:130

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